Eggnog Cake Bites

I’m sitting here with 4 hours of sleep in my eyeballs.

I’m wearing a really stupid looking and illogical amalgamation of sleepwear.

I’m finally coming to accept that some combinations are simply unattractive.

Like no matter what you do, what you say, how hard you try… the end result of bringing select factors together is just gonna be ugly.

That’s all.

The end.

Nothing to get your panties knotted up over.

Potentially something to learn from?

Or not.

I obviously haven’t.

Like my ridiculous late-night/early morning baking marathons.

They’re never a good idea.

In fact, they’re usually a terrible idea. Ultra super terrible.

My life never looks like that cute little cupcake girl on the box up there. I mean, I typically intend to be pretty much done with my sweet endeavors by 12 am… still looking like a live human, daintily frosting something.

My hair will never be cool like cake box kid’s, but I’m okay with that.

I guess.

 

But in real life, I’m Swiffering my kitchen floor and waiting for junk to come out of the oven at 4 am.

There’s chocolate all up in my hair.

At that point, I don’t much care.

I’ll wake up 4.5 hours later with a horrific sugar hangover wondering why I consistently do this to myself.

 

And that, ladies and gentleman, is roughly where I’m at right now.

Supposed to be driving 4 hours home to Valdosta today. Nothing packed whatsoever. Evil headache. Having company for brunch in an hour. Still wearing a moronic PJ combo.

I wish you could see it.

No I don’t.

Truly, I’ve no clue why I always do it, when I’m fully aware that late night, no sleep Darcy + baking= ugly.

It’s a lot like Darcy dipping stuff in chocolate.

We talked about this not too long ago

I have an infatuation with dipping stuff in chocolate. As if I’m good at doing it or something.

I’m not. At all.

The first picture in this post is my careful attempt to make you think I am.

The photo above is what the vast majority of my cake ball bag looks like.
Not attractive. My dipping things in chocolate is highly unattractive. Period.

FYI, 3 am is not the prime time to practice chocolatiering . Prudence dies by 2 am.

Anyway, if you’ll please excuse me, I need to go strip the white chocolate from my follicles. My guests might think it’s freakishly crusty dandruff.

Ugly situation all around.

 

Eggnog Cake Bites

  • 1 standard boxed yellow cake mix (I used Duncan Hines Classic Yellow)
  • 1 cup eggnog
  • 1/3 cup bourbon
  • 1/3 cup vegetable oil
  • 3 large eggs
  • 1/2 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
  • 1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
  • 12 Tbsp butter, softened
  • 2 1/2-3 cups powdered sugar
  • 4 Tbsp eggnog
  • 1-2 Tbsp bourbon
  • 24 ounces white baking chocolate
  • 1 Tbsp butter

 

Preheat oven to 350 F and grease a 9×13 baking pan.

In a large mixing bowl, thoroughly combine the cake mix, eggnog, bourbon, oil, eggs,  vanilla, and nutmeg. Pour into prepared pan and bake as instructed on the box (32-35 minute, or until tests done).

Allow to cool completely.

In the meantime, prepare the frosting.

Beat the butter until creamy, then beat in powdered sugar 1/2 cup at a time. When the mixture begins to thicken, add in the eggnog and bourbon by Tablespoon full. Adjust to taste.

Once the cake is cooled crumble it into a large mixing bowl. Add the frosting to the bowl and beat on low-speed with an electric mixer until evenly combined. Refrigerate until the cake mixture solidifies.

Once hard enough to handle scoop the cake ball mixture by spoonful and roll into compact balls. Place on wax paper-lined cookie sheets, then place the cookie sheets in your freezer for at least 30 minutes.

Carefully melt the white chocolate and butter over low heat, stirring constantly. Dip each cake ball in the white chocolate to coat and place back on cookie sheet to harden. You will have to work in batches, as the cake bites will soften, making them harder to dip.

Keep completed cake bites refrigerated.

 

 

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