Peanut Butter Pretzel Buckeyes

I know it may be hard to see sometimes, but I fully support living a healthy lifestyle.

You know…eating in moderation, respecting your food, physical activity, balance, fruits, veggies…all that sort of stuffs.

I think it’s great when people want to make a genuine conscious effort to alter their eating habits in order to adopt such a healthful mode of living and maybe drop that tire they’re currently carrying around their waist, but there’s one thing that just really irks me..

When people start funking with dessert.

When I see people start throwing around junk like “fat-free” “sugar-free” “diet friendly” brownies, I’m just like…. Excuse me, what?

Um, NO.

Brownies are not diet friendly. They were never intended to be diet friendly. They are a decadent, calorific treat and that’s that.

If you’re trying to shed a few pounds, then you pass on on the brownies. The end.

Want dessert? Eat fruit, or yogurt, or something that’s naturally a little less fattening.

This is by no means a “let’s punish fat people” thing…this is more of a “Come on, get real” thing. Allow me to explain. I feel I’m coming off like a complete meanie right now.

But seriously…sure, you can concoct a brownie-lookin item using low-fat chocolate product, applesauce, and black beans…but why the heck would you want to?? In what universe is that thing going to taste nearly as good as a legit brownie?

Furthermore, are you actually going to  enjoy your “healthy” brownie? …Or is it more about the mental satisfaction of being allowed to have a traditionally rich dessert?

So many questions.


It’s not like I’m against picking up healthier cooking habits, or implementing more nutritious substitutes into your daily eating routine. No, not in the slightest. I like to stick whole wheat in plenty of stuff.

I just wish people would show  a smidge more appreciation for what they shove in their faces. I mean, you are not obligated to eat a huge slab of chocolate cake after dinner…chocolate cake is a special pleasure. So why not just enjoy the real thing in moderation, instead of try to manipulate ways to sneak some gross look-alike  into your daily diet.

That is not respect for food. That is not a healthy mindset. Sorry, it’s just not.


I’m not trying to be condescending, really. Lord knows I’ve experienced my share of dessert abuse, but in general, I try not to stick anything in my mouth that I’m not going to truly savor.

I’m just venting on a personal beef I have with our society’s attitude towards grub. It’s just one of those moods. Humor me.

If I have to see one more “reality” show featuring overly dramatic obese people crying and battling it out with buff personal trainers over going  to the gym, while 15% of our population are food insecure…well uhh, I don’t know, it’s just annoying.

Okay, no more Darcy downer. Here’s my contribution to the healthy sweets movement. Peanut butter for protein, mixed with pretzels for grains, and coated in chocolate for antioxidants.

Enjoy. I wish everyone the best of luck on those spring break bods. Ow owww.


Oh, you could make some Butterfinger brownies while you’re at it. Just spread 3/4 cup crushed Butterfingers candy atop a recipe of my deep dark brownies in the last 5 minutes of baking.

They’re totally good for you.

Good for your soul.

Peanut Butter Pretzel Buckeyes

  • 1 cup peanut butter
  • 1/4 cup butter, softened
  • 2 cups powdered sugar
  • 1/2 tsp vanilla extract
  • 1 cup crushed pretzels
  • 10 ounces semisweet chocolate
  • 1 tbsp shortening

Beat the butter and peanut butter with an electric mixer until light and fluffy. Beat in the powdered sugar, 1/2 cup at a time, then add the vanilla extract. Mix in the crushed pretzel pieces.

Form the peanut butter mixture into 1 inch balls and place onto a wax paper-lined cookie sheet. Place in the freezer for at least 30-45 minutes.

In a small saucepan over low heat, melt the chocolate and shortening. Whisking until smooth. Be careful, as chocolate burns easily.

With a fork, dip each peanut butter-pretzel ball into the melted chocolate and allow excess to drip off. Return to cookie sheet and allow chocolate to set.

Store in an airtight container in fridge.



3 thoughts on “Peanut Butter Pretzel Buckeyes

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